They weren’t really all that bad, but I will admit there were times when trying to raise four kids made birds seem like a pretty good idea…..

A few years ago my youngest son, John wrote this poem for me. I thought you might enjoy it. (actually it was about 40 years ago, lol)

Remember the days when the kids played together

Regardless of time, regardless of weather?

Now all they do is squabble and fight

From early in the morning, ’til late at night.

“I am the tallest” “I am most fair!”

” I am the softest, all covered in hair!”

Mom intervened, with loving discourse

“I love you all equally, totally, of course.”

But the brats wouldn’t buy it, they lived to compete

Whether breathing the loudest, or largest sized feet

Soon they were brawling, fighting you see,

To claim her attention “look at me, look at me!”

Mother got tired, and then she got mad

Then she told each of us, we had no dad!

“Virgin birth products, that’s what you are

Delivered by aliens from a far distant star.

Your ancestry is mixed and your genes are all torn

I wish oh how I wish you had never been born!!!”

Silence descended, the children were crushed

Then John spoke up, in a voice that was hushed

“Oh mother mine, my heart is quite broken

I am bruised and damaged by the words you have spoken.

My ribs are staved in and my tibula’s shattered.

You’ve robbed my world of all that has mattered.

I hate to brag, and I don’t like to boast,

But I’m willing to bet that you hate me the MOST!”

Then Joanie spoke up, her eyes lit with fire

“She hates me most, cause I slashed her tire!”

“No, it’s me” Bruce exclaimed, “I’m in the cellar,

I broke all her vases and never did tell her.”

Not to be beaten, Kelly chimed in,

“This is one contest I bound to win!

I’ve broken her china

And peed in her chairs

And tangled gum in her little neck hairs!”

Shaking her head, and with a wee little fart

Mommy dearest made as to depart.

“You’ve turned out quite spoiled, your antics absurd

Next time around, I’m gonna raise birds!”

9 Comments so far

  1. Tammy @ July 15th, 2008

    How old was he when he wrote this? It is actually quite good and very funny! I used to be an English teacher. Kids writing makes me happy!

    Tammy

  2. sandy @ July 15th, 2008

    I think he was about 8… he’s always had a funny sense of humor. Now he’s 49, and still a real kick!

  3. WonderWoman @ July 15th, 2008

    Now that is too cute. :)

  4. kamaperry @ July 15th, 2008

    Lmao! This is awesome, thanks for sharing! To think he could write like that at 8!

  5. JustJane47 @ July 16th, 2008

    I was laughing all the way through….that was AWESOME!!! LMAO!!! what a sense of humor he has. Thank you for making my day so bright. This was the first blog for the day…couldn’t have started out any better :)

  6. Nicole622 @ July 16th, 2008

    LOL that is so cute!

  7. chrisie @ July 17th, 2008

    I missed this yesterday…glad I saw your other blog…seems like someone got their sense of humor from their mom: )
    thanks for sharing!
    like the part…about the wee little fart: )

  8. sandy @ July 17th, 2008

    What a thing to say about your mom! That boy has no respect! pppfffftt! lol

  9. poet @ July 19th, 2008

    Wow! I am impresed! Parenting is for the birds obviously, lol! Your son is a hoot! just like you. The apple doesn’t fall far from the tree. Luv Ya! sista!

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